Future plans

My baby told me that he's planning to further study for master program in UK. Depends on the financial condition on the family. When I first found out about the plan I was pretty sad because I wasn't told straight from him. Well, he said haven't really decide yet so I wasn't told. Now that I found out I was sad because we've planned so much to having holiday together after he is back from UK in October, but then suddenly he wanted to continue study for another year which means I have to wait here alone till next year for him to be back. Just feel so scared because in such long distance and time can make things change.. nobody can guarantee anything...feel so scared...

But today he told me that I'm part of his future plans. He wanted to have a future with me and if he were to really study and eventually get a job in UK, he wants me to be there with him. I asked him how important I am and he said I'm the most important to him. I wanted to know it because I'm afraid to wait him back and in the end I mean nothing much to him. If he meant what he said, then I will wait for him to come bck after a year, or in the case of really settling down in UK, I may be going off there to be with him- if nothing happened...i wish everything will be fine and we will always together..

Hoping and wishing it well...=)

End of the week

Today is saturday and is pretty sad that the end of the week is reaching soon...really tired today.

Got back from work at grocery shop and pretty tired again as usual...stand the hunger till 2pm plus before I can take my own meal..sucks..=(

Reach home took a good shower and felt fresh again...took my lunch [tapao food] and I went online to check on my emails and FB. Got no messages and I've expected that. What to do, he and I also don't know is it having cold war or not..Sobz...Sad also no use..life still have to move on...working does makes me feel drifted away and drag my mind off from thinking about him...it's true that loving someone can be really painful and suffocating...and people always says why so suffering also want to get involved? I also don't know how to answer...u love someone that's why u will have to go through the bad times of arguments, cold wars and accepting someone that has different character and perceptions from yours...thats why love can be suffering too...

I wanna sleepppp...dunwan think...dunwan wake up....time pls stop at the happy moments only...sobzzz

A bad day

Today had misunderstanding with him and it made my day so bad...well I deserve it because I was the one causing the problem and misunderstanding....padan muka

Today have no mood to do my things and I didn't talk much with my family members. He also didn't say anything to me after that. Showed me the conversation telling me I was the one didn't read properly what he said...my bad...

Beginning to think that I'm not a good person to be with actually. I know he's suffering after couple with me... Just that he doesn't want to tell me how he feels...Sometimes I think it's better for him to look for someone else better than me...a girl that can trust him completely...obey him and never ask him for this and that, provide him total freedom and love...

I don't fit any of those...I don't know what am I anymore....a terrible monster....

I want to sleep and never wake up anymore......

Things not as beautiful as we think it is

Just notice that things not as we think it is..sometimes it's not as perfect as we think it is...not beautiful like we wish it is...really need to wake up from the silly naive dream of mine...need to face the fact that nothing is smooth and beautiful like i always imagine and hope for...

No nid worry because he's not reading whatever that I post here in my blog...I didn't know that all these while he actually don't like to read my blog... I don't know at all...and make a mess and misunderstanding in FB...lolz...thought we were thinking of the same thing and...click with each other...owh...which is not....really sad to know that...

I sound really so forcing him...Sorry if I do..I just don't know how to be his gf...Wish god can tell me...

Eucerin for sale

Previous post stated that the cleanser is good...well indeed it works for the first week for me..but the second week onward it makes my skin broke out. I got no idea is it the lactic acid cause allergy or what but it doesn't improve my skin after that. Well it doesn't suit me but it may suit other people..I've read many blogs raving about the cleanser and the scrub..so those having good time with these two products are free to purchase these two items...

DermoPurifiyer Cleanser : RM 25 (90% left)

DermoPurifiyer Scrub : RM 25 (90% left)

*Inclusive of postage*

Anyone interested pls email kikilala0289@hotmail.com..

I need to clarify that these products were purchased by myself and not sponsored or what. I sell it off mainly because it doesn't suit my skin and it may not for other people...

Penang Trip 2011

Ok..it's time to update about the holiday trip to Penang island this year. I went there with beloved baby and his sister with her bf as well..we went for 3 days and stayed at Century Bay apartment which is such a pretty apartment with many facilities. I love the apartment.. =) We brought along smelly pot pot Yorkie and noti pot Nymus.. We drove there and every time we tour drove to the destinations...The first place we went to w

as the Snake Temple. There were many snakes my god.So many different species and we got shocked by one of the snakes..it hissed so loudly and attacked us. Thank god we were protected by the glass barrier if not, we might got bitten by the snake..Pheww.. There was a python, very gentle and not dangerous at all...It was said that if we touch the python from head to tail while praying ur wish then the wish will come true..We tried touching but not sure how true is the fact?!

See how huge is the snake?? Fat...

Next destination was Kek Lok Si Temple. We walked to the top temple and also the new Kwan Yin Temple that requires cable car to reach. The place is awesome..very beautiful with huge Kwan Yin statue...There are cute seats too with cute animals at the end of the bench... Besides that, there are 12 chinese zodiac statues and I love the dragon!

See the dog? It's at the end of the bench...owhh...my baby boy bully him..!

My beloved baby boy hugs me so closely...I like this! =)

We traveled by car and beloved baby boy drove here and there. We took the opportunity to cam whore in the car..Lolz...He smiled..i love his smile...=)

Nearby the kwan yin statue..my baby love this 'Lion' so much...

See the Kwan Yin? Looks small but actually huge

see the cute bench? It's a m

onkey at the end..

We went to few places but I only going to upload some of it..This place is the Sleeping Buddha nearby Strait Quay. Strait Quay is a beautiful place just nearby the beach! =) At the Sleeping Buddha baby boy and I

were clingy and took some pictures together

Smile!

Baby say this Garuda very nice! So took picture

Sleeping buddha!

Had very nice trip with baby boy..the best thing was sleeping beside him in apartment...feel so safe beside him! =)

Touching song

This song is by Chilam Cheung. The title is In Love with Alien...I like this song so so much..It's nice..

This is another song I like by Rascal Flatts called God Bless The Broken Roads...oh I like so much!!

Enjoy listening...=)

Getting used to the new life

I'm trying to get used to my new life without baby here. It's hard obviously. Everyday I will count the time. Every day after I wake up I will automatically count the time in UK and trying to imagine what he is probably doing that time. Today is his first day of class. Ever since he went there I can feel that the connection between us slowly like fading. Maybe is because we are lack of connection and communication. When he is free to chat, the time is already late here in Malaysia.

I beginning to doubt the fact that we can keep in touch. It's a little hard for it to be real..to be able to keep in touch as promised or planned. Like now, I know that he got my email but there's no reply from him. I got no news from him. It's like he's gone. I just don't know what to do..to keep waiting or just go online when I feel like it and don't care whether he'll online or not whether we can still keep in touch or not...

No news from him now...Perhaps I'm too sensitive already..What am I going to do?? It's hard to get used to it... As if I've lost him...

Simple current skin care products review

I always watch videos in YouTube whereby people just love to do skin care review and routine they have to keep their skin healthy and clear. Now, I personally don't have perfect skin ok. My skin is just so freaking terrible especially back in my teenage years [16-17 years old]. That time I have so severe acne on my face. My whole face was covered with spots, pimples and cyst. It was so horrible and gross. My face didn't have any smooth surface bac

k then. I was so ashamed and didn't even dare to look into the mirror. I'd tried so many products and even went to see skin specialist and beautician. Well, the dermatologist gave me a lot of antibiotics and some products but I didn't work well because once I stopped taking the medication, the pimples came out again. I couldn't completely rely on the drugs. I wanted something more stable and gives good results in a long run. The beautician's products were really good but it was just too expensive. One set cost about RM300+. Which is too expensive for student like me to buy again after finishing..

Well, I've tried so so many products from drugstore to high-en

d type. I've used Neutrogena, Garnier, OXY, Clearasil and some other products like Charpoem, Bioglo and even high-end products like Laneige. But non of those can give me constant or long lasting result on my skin. Even the expensive Laneige gel cleanser doesn't keep my skin any clearer or better compare to the current products I'm using..

Now, straight to the point. Currently, I'm using products that are formulated to acne-prone skin and sensitive skin. All these products were fantastic and it works pretty well so far and I don't suffer from any reactions and massive breakouts so far..Ok..my skin care routine is the same everyday with cleanse, tone and mositurise and sometimes t

reating spots and doing some face treatment like applying masks.

1. Cleanse

The cleanser I use daily now is the Eucerin DermoPurifiyer cleanser. This cleanser specially formulated to treat acne-prone skin. I got to know about Eucerin from my friend that Eucerin is the famous brand recommended by many dermatologis

t to treat sensitive and acne-prone skin. I used Laneige before this but I see that it doesn't treat my pimples to the root. I got a lot of tiny bumps underneath my skin which is YUCKS..Hate it..So I use this:

This Eucerin cleanser is so gentle and after cleansing it doesn't leave my skin dry and tight. It's gentle but effective to cleanse the skin from sebum and also contains lactic acid to deeply cleanse the skin and has anti-bacterial effect. I've used about almost a week and I've notice that my skin is so much clearer and the tiny bumps almost all gone. Complexion is smoother and no breakouts experienced. Well to find out more on how the DermoPurifiyer systems works..visit this site Eucerin

Price: RM 30+

Rate: 4/5

Will I repurchase: Yes!

2. Tone

After cleansing, it's important to tone your face because it will remove the left-over cleanser or even make up from your face and also toner functions also to close the pores after cleansing and make the skin more refreshed. It also works as a base to prep your skin ready for moisturiser. I've used many type of toners too and this is my favourite of all.. Simple's Kind to Skin Soothing Toner is a toner that's loved by many people specially in UK mainly because the price super cheap and it's so gentle on the skin. I don't have sensitive skin but I always believe sensitive skin products are less harmful and protects the skin better. So I choose this. Indeed after using bout 1/3 of the bottle I love it and everyday will use some time to slowly swipe it all over my face and let it slowly absorb into my skin by doing padding motions using my palm and fingers. Face feel refreshed instantly..

Price: RM 15.70

Rate: 5/5

Will I repurchase: Yes definitely!

3. Moisturize

After toning, it's time to apply moisturizer to keep the skin moisturized. I love this moisturizer because the ingredients are very gentle and it has a lot skin loving nutrients and vitamins which helps to soften the skin and making it hydrated. Hydrated skin will be less oilier and also healthier. Check out this link to get further details of the Simple skin care : SIMPLE

I use this moisturizer in the day after cleansing and toning and I just need a little pea size amount for the whole face. My skin is oily type so it's not wise to use too much moisturizer as it can be too hydrating for my skin and after few hours, it can be very oily. But overall this moisturizer improved my skin condition and now my skin won't be dry and tight after a few hours in the shopping mall..Likey!

Price: RM 19.90

Rate: 5/5

Will I repurchase: Yes

During night time, we need to moisturize our skin too and especially at night because our skin undergoes process of regeneration and renew of skin. Thus, night cream is formulated to provide sufficient nutrients and care for the process. Therefore at night after cleansing and toning, I use SIMPLE's Kind to Skin Vital Vitamin Night Cream. This cream contains 3 skin loving nutrients and 3 vital vitamins which are essential to restore and replenish the skin throughout the night. This cream is really rich so again for me I need just a little pea size amount to cover my whole face or else throughout the night my skin will be so oily and will cause breakout..But if apply in proper amount it will give a smoother and supple skin the day after...

Price: RM 30+

Rate: 4/5

Will I repurchase: Maybe..

I hope the review helpful to those planning to purchase the above products..But anyway different people have different skin tolerance and acceptance. So, it may work for me but it may not for you. Believe in yourself and if that product is not suitable for you, your skin will tell you..like breakouts, dryness, allergy and hypersensitivity...

Hope this helps...

Take care and speak again soon!

Special Gifts from Baby boy

Before baby boy left, he presented me with a few gifts that I appreciate it greatly. During our Penang holiday, he gave me a rice art necklace. The necklace has a glow-in-the-dark rice with writings on it. He wrote ' I <3 U' on one side and 'U <3 I' on the other side. Besides that, the glass tube containing the rice has ' I <3 U' molded on the surface too.. So the necklace was picked by him..=P. Before this he gave me a necklace that looks almost the same an has the same wordings written on the rice. Too bad I broke the necklace back then..but never mind I have another one now that makes me keep it properly as one thing that I can remember him by..

On our last date, he bought 3 packets of Kinder Bueno. A choco that I love a lot besides Beryls dark choco. I complained to him that he didn't share some with me when he bought it so he purposely bought another one to give me...=) Such sweet and understanding guy I just don't know where to find anymore..I do love him and miss him so much right now..see the choco I think of him...see phone think of him..see my pillows will think of him....just thinking of him.

Well the Hitachi hard disc he gave me too..He sponsored me half. All was because he wanted to give me a lot of movies and series before he leaves for UK but unfortunately my D drive is too compact with files and assignment documents... I appreciate everything he did for me

TQ baby

The value of relationship

Now another post..

I remembered that two days before his departure we had a small misunderstanding..I judged myself that time and I thought of breaking up with baby boy.. I judged the value of our relationship... He told me some of my weaknesses and that moment I felt so ashamed of myself for casting so many problems to him..I felt really ashamed..I thought that "If I'm such a terrible person, maybe he deserves a better girl.. Maybe we should break up.."

He text me but I ignored it.. Then when I saw him at the market, I avoided him completely and walked far away with tears flowing down non-stop..I cried because I couldn't face this guy..I felt ashamed of myself..I caused so many problems to him..He said I was not happy letting him make friends...which is what a GF shouldn't do..but he said I did [I don't think I did]..So I can't forgive myself for that...I thought he told me that was like an indication that it's the time to end it...

But he told me he still loves me so much and more than before....which makes him accepted everything of me....Our relationship still strong...the value is just...cannot be measured...I love him so so so much too...

Anyway, it's easy to be said by another person advising me not to be sad of his leaving, but honestly, if that particular person in my position right now, I can bet that he/she is just like me now...sad to the boot..! =) But never mind, I'm fine now...=) I believe he's in UK already...Just hope he misses me too..=P

Tata..

XD

The crazy pig ping sing [the nick name baby named me]

Life goes on

Well it's really been a long time since I posted. Sorry for that..Well I've promised my beloved Jian Choong to be strong and not to be sad after his departure to UK. It's ok to be sad right but as long as not for too long, then I believe my baby boy will forgive me..=) I sent him off yesterday at KLIA. That was the first time I've been to Malaysia's International Airport. It's huge and packed with peoples..from just everywhere..I can see from my baby's eyes that he was excited and sad at the same time..He was happy and excited to be going off to UK and travel by plane but he was sad to leave everyone he loves in Malaysia for few months..

Of course the same feeling strikes me and also his family members..All of us came to send him off for his study journey to UK and no doubt almost everyone cried.. His father and I were the only two held our tears back. Before the day of departure, I've promised him to be good girl and be strong..I will keep my promise..

But this is how life always be and how human always are. Life never a straight smooth road and there will always be cry times, smile times, happy times and sorrow times..But I'm really grateful because although now I'm facing really bad times having to be departed from baby boy, I still had many happy moment with him before his departure. We went for our last date, had a great movie and dinner together, went to hunt for his UK trip necessities, went to collect his air ticket with him, had a fun holiday in Penang...and so on...This leaves me no regret or misery anymore.

He left already..I still need to move on my life here in Ipoh another few months without him..If you're reading this baby, wish you luck always in UK and most important of all is study hard and enjoy your new life there k? Be careful and take care...

Loving you always [mean it] and miss u