What I want?

I duno what I want from him. Haiz. Yest I sudd told him that I dunwan to contact his this weekend. I actually don't want to say it but I got idea why I got the courage to say it. I actually missing him looking forward to weekend hopefully can spend more time for each other even though we can't meet. But then, yest after talking to him I felt a little bad that he like duno anything bout me this few days alot happened but I never get to tell him. Reason? Coz we rarely contact at nite. Timing not rite. So I duno think this weekend will b any difference. I think might even worse. So I dunwan get myself hurt or sad waiting for his reply.Y not just dun contact. haha. Sound so siu hei rite? But that's me. I am like that. I very not reasonable not understanding..Haiz...